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REMEMBERING A WOMAN'S THOUGHTS . . .

This quote is from Sandra Schrift of La Mesa, CA from a publication called "Perspectives: Winter 1989"

If you are unhappy, be unhappy.
Do not judge yourself for being that way.  
It is wonderful to be unhappy;
It is the expression of emotion.
Love your unhappiness. 
It means you are ready for change.
You are ready to go forward,
     yet you mourn for the old;
     you are not ready to let go.
Allow the unhappiness.
There is purposefulness in it.

Remove from your life
     everything that inhibits you
     from being the totality of yourself.
That is called "becoming."
Remove from your thoughts all the
     have-to's,
     should's,
     must's.
Remove the images you think you must be
     and just be.

Embrace your life.
Know that you created it.
Love all that you have been,
     said, and done.
Know it was all purposeful.
Never see anything as a failure.
See everything as an accomplishment.
Love the hurt, the pain, the sorrow.
For what an experience!
What a wonderment!
What jewels of wisdom are now in your treasury!

Be your own teacher, friend, counsel.
Confide in yourself.
Speak to yourself.

Seek answers that feel right within your soul.
Your soul knows what the truth is,
     and it will tell you through feelings.
Always listen to your feelings.
They know. . . they know.

Never do anything,
     no matter how far you are into it,
     if you lose the joy of it
     and it becomes monotonous and mundane.
Do away with it
and do something else that brings happiness.
For perhaps what you needed to learn from it
     you have already achieved.
Go wherever you want to go.
Do whatever you want to do
     for as long as you want to.

Create only for the mere joy of creating.
When you create for joy,
     you will soon find yourself living in joy.

Don't ever strive to have anyone understand you.
If they wish to understand, they will.

Love everyone.
Have compassion for all other entities.
You do not need to go and take care of them.
Love them by allowing them to express
     however they choose.
That is the greatest thing you can do!
If they are angered or disappointed by your life,
     love them by allowing them to be that way.

 WHY MOTHERS OF ADULT CHILDREN HAVE A TOUGH TIME

Many mother's confess that some of the items on this list to be all too true. 

If we are concerned, we are overprotective.
If we are unconcerned, we are neglectful.
If we nurture generously, we are smothering.
If we nurture less, we are withholding.
If we are successful, we are intimidating.
If we are unsuccessful, we are poor role models.
If we are available, we encourage dependency.
If we busy ourselves, we are detached.
If we offer advice, we are controlling.
If we refrain, we are disinterested.
If we phone, write or visit often, we are pests.
If we don't, we are thought uncaring.
If we loan money, we engender resentment.
If we don't give or loan, we are cheap.
If we help with their tasks, we are drudges.
If we don't, we are considered lazy.
If we love husbands or others first, we have no life of our own.
If we put ourselves first, we are narcissistic.
If we hide our needs, we are martyrs.
If we reveal our needs, we are demanding.
If we provide for our old age, we are selfish.
If we don't provide, we are burdens.
If we pitch in, we question their competency.
If we don't pitch in, they question our competency.
If all or some is true, we might as well just go ahead and do what we wish and do it outrageously!

SHAKE IT OFF!

One day a farmer's donkey fell down into a well.

The animal cried piteously for hours as the farmer tried to figure out what to do.

Finally he decided the animal was old and the well needed to be covered up anyway. It just wasn't worth it to retrieve the donkey.

He invited all his neighbors to come over and help him. They all grabbed a shovel and began to shovel dirt into the well. At first, the donkey realized what was happening and cried horribly.

Then, to everyone's amazement, he quieted down. A few shovel loads later, the farmer finally looked down the well and was astonished at what he saw. With every shovel of dirt that hit his back, the donkey was doing something amazing. He would shake it off and take a step up. As the farmer's neighbors continued to shovel dirt on top of the animal, he would shake it off and take a step up. Pretty soon, everyone was amazed as the donkey stepped up over the edge of the well and trotted off!

Life is going to shovel dirt on you, all kinds of dirt. The trick to getting out of the well is to shake it off and take a step up. Each of our troubles is a stepping stone. We can get out of the deepest wells just by not stopping, never giving up! Shake it off and take a step up!

Remember these five simple rules to be happy

1. Free your heart from hatred.

2. Free your mind from worries.

3. Live simply.

4. Give more.

5. Expect less.

COMING INTO THE LIGHT

So many times, the tunnels I have faced
Have seemed to me,
Dark, foreboding, and lonely.
Had I only known that the light was as close to me
As I am to my Father in Heaven
Never would I have been afraid of the dark

Finding Faith in times of affliction
Is often a very difficult assignment.
When our spirits are troubled,
The tasks seem overwhelming
Our faith often becomes weak.

At this time, we need to place our hands
Lovingly into those of the Father.
As we allow Him to lead the way
He will beckon us to follow Him
Along the paths He has prepared

To leave our own agendas behind
And as we willingly follow,
We will find peace.

We must always remember
That no matter how dark the night
He will be there to raise the sun again
As we face a brand new day.

Written By Kathy Groner
1999